As I've grown older, I've become more comfortable level-setting expectations or throwing them out the window. Why, you may ask, because unmet expectations, whether spoken or unspoken, can lead to a ceaseless pool of resentment.
Having a morning Latte with sugar-free caramel, oat milk, and an extra expresso shot has become a staple for my mornings. Depending on who's making it, when I get to the neighborhood coffee shop, I prepare to be moderately excited or extremely excited because everyone makes it differently. I can't control the intent and heart some put into making coffee versus others. I never thought I'd be this dramatic over coffee, but here we are.
The point is that when I adjust my expectations based on who is making it, I'm not disappointed and resentful. I can walk out of the coffee shop and still enjoy my morning Latte regardless of who made it because having it and enjoying it is the primary goal, as opposed to being upset about what it was or wasn't.
I understand there are other things in life where you have your expectations, like when you go to a restaurant and order your favorite meal; you want it to taste the same every time, or when you tell your children to take the chicken out of the freezer before you get home. Still, there will be times when those hopeful thoughts can't materialize by the people or places you held your expectations towards, and you can either stay in resentment or adjust your disappointment to move on with your life.
While I don't believe exclusively getting rid of expectations is the answer, I do think we should take a deeper look at the potential resentment that could occur from our expectations and consider whether we're ready to work through that resentment when the person, place, or thing doesn't behave like we want.
Threaded Update:
If you ordered your book before May 8th, you should have it by now, and I hope you are enjoying it. Check out the blog post on the website, where you can leave your review of the book after you read it. Find it at:
haveconversation.com/blogs/news/post-your-threaded-review-here.
If you purchased your book after May 8th, it is currently in production, so you can have it hot off the press! You'll receive an update with tracking information soon.
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